Vortexes and Blackholes
by hiya24
Summary: A FMA and Buffy the Vampire Slayer crossover. What happens when Willow finds an usual spell? Lots of picking on Ed and well you just have to read to see. Rated t for safety and certain people's mouths. Do not own anything.
1. Chapter 1

A/N: This is my very first fanfic so I'm a bit nervous (yeah everyone says that for their first time). Please be honest but gentle with reviews and flames... well I'll probably cry and then edit. The setting of the story is this: sometime after the end of BVS series and at first I was going to say that it didn't matter for FMA but now I have decided that it will be set in manga verse before Briggs comes into the picture but after the encounter with Father.

Vortexes and Blackholes

Chapter One

Graveyard Encounters

It was a dark cloudless night. A sliver of the moon tried its best to dispel the blackness as the stars twinkled in silent witness to the moon's failure. Still the moon was able to reflect off the cold hard rock and illuminate a portion of the inscription on the limestone. "Here lies An… Loving Moth… Born June… Died…." Was all that one could read if one were trying to read the gravestone.

The moon was seeking for ways to expand its wavering light and found three heads to reflect off as they ran through the graveyard. One was dark and green that only absorbed the light rather than reflecting it; so the moon concentrated on the other heads. One was blond, and the moon thought that the head was usually close to the ground, luckily the person the head belonged to could not hear the moon's thoughts or the moon may not have existed for much longer. The last head was metal and tall, the moon's light bounced easily off of it much to the moon's delight.

Ed, the owner of the blond head, was running hard. Al, with the metal head, ran right beside him. The sound of their running steps and Ed's breathing was interrupted only by the sounds of Envy's taunting.

"Full Metal pipsqueak, why do you think you can follow me to my new hideout?"

"Don't call me a pipsqueak!"

"Why? You can't hide from the truth!"

At Envy's reply, Edward clapped his hands and hit the ground with them. Suddenly….

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"Patrolling, Patrolling, Patrolling… sigh"

Buffy looked around at the familiar scene of the graveyard. Well maybe not so familiar… Smack

"Why is it in France they feel the need to put humongous statues all over their graveyards?" Willow asked.

"Well maybe if you watched where you were going you wouldn't run into things." Spike replied a bit amused.

"Well, how many Vamps are supposed to be here again?" Buffy asked effectively changing the subject and avoiding another verbal sparring match between the two. She really thought they were acting like children and it was giving her a headache.

"Our slimy little informant said it was a meeting of a pretty big badie with about ten or so little henchies." Spike said followed with a, "Why did I just sound like Zander?"

"I don't know maybe you should stop hanging out with him?"

"We do not hang out! We hate each other!"

"How much do you hate each other?"

"Passionately"

"So you and Zander have a passionate feeling?"

"What the bloody hell are you talking about Willow? Never mind lets just find the guys, dust them and get the hell out of here." Spike said completely exasperated.

"Oh, there it is." Buffy said very excitedly.

She was indicating a very odd looking, though not at all odd looking to the slayer and friends, group of around 11 'men'. Most looked like the 'typical' vampires with leather jackets and jeans. However, one of them was wearing a black robe and looked… well if you ever saw your Aunt Ethel with boils on a bad hair day, you get the picture.

Said thing looked at Buffy and started to say, "Who are you?" But only got out a "Wh" as Buffy threw a wooden steak right into his heart. A big "poof" and only dust remained.

The other Vampires yelled "Slayer!" and subsequently ran.

"Great, now we're going to spend the rest of our night rounding these guys up." Spike said.

"But that's our job." Buffy replied in a clearly annoyed voice (the headache was getting bigger).

That being said the trio set out for the vampires rather depressed that they would have another completely sleepless night.

To pass the time and keep two people from fighting Buffy asked Willow which spell she was working on, to which Willow replied, "It's some kind of summoning spell, but I'm not sure how it works. I mean it's in English or a close comparison of English which is strange. And the first part is about some kind of 'Equivalent Exchange' and I have no idea what it is talking about. I am thinking that I'll give Giles a call soon if my research doesn't start to show some results."

"Does it have a pendent or anything that goes with it?" Buffy asked.

"Yeah, I've got it here and see it just has a picture of some door on it… Hey it kinda looks like it's shining……….AHHHHAHAHA!"

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A/N: So how was that for a beginning? Sorry about the cliffhanger and the shortness ducks from Ed, but I figure that if you like it you will tell me to hurry up and post more, or not if you hate it. I already have the second chapter done so I will post it soon, just read and review so I know if I am making horrible mistakes )


	2. Chapter 2: Chance, Fate

A/N: I won't be doing these at the beginning after this chapter, but I needed to add my disclaimer.

Disclaimer: hiya24 and affiliates do not in any way shape or form own 'The Fullmetal Alchemist' or 'Buffy the Vampire Slayer'. FMA belongs to someone whose name I can never remember that lives in Japan and BVS belongs to Joss something and their respective affiliates, this author is just borrowing for fun and will return after. This disclaimer is applicable to the rest of the story including chapter one to the end.

Chapter Two

Chance, Fate, and Strategically Placed Objects

Edward blinked. He didn't know why, but he was on the ground. Last thing he remembered was performing a transmutation that would create a small Grand Canyon under Envy.

"Must have been a rebound." He mused followed by calling out, "Al" and hearing a groan.

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Buffy felt sore all over. Whatever that vortex thingy was, it had knocked her across the graveyard to the nearest statue. She thought it was funny how things always seem to pop out at just the right angle and place to break her fall.

She groaned "I hope Will's ok," and heard someone yell.

"AL"

"?"

"Al, where the hell are you?"

Buffy stood and saw some kid in a red coat.

"Hey kid, you shouldn't be here right now." She yelled

"Envy? That's a new one, but don't think that some new form and my little rebound are going to help you get away from me." Ed yelled back, clearly annoyed.

"Who or what is Envy?"

"Very funny."

…

"Willow, Spike, get over here."

"Can't find Will, who's the kid?"

"My name is Edward Elric The Full Metal Alchemist and stop calling me a kid!" Edward yelled. He looked very annoyed with the two, almost to the point that he wanted to kill or seriously maim them.

Buffy raised an eyebrow and Spike smirked.

"Isn't that a rather long name for such a short person?" Spike asked.

This, of course, led into one of Edward's famous rants which caused Buffy and Spike to laugh so hard they found themselves unable to stop. As Edward continued and Buffy and Spike laughed one of the vampires from before quietly made his way to be behind Edward.

"Ahmm, smells young, the younger the better." The vampire said as he grabbed Edward from behind.

A few things happened at once, or in such quick succession that it was hard to tell what happened first. Edward grinned his evil little grin that only Edward can do. Buffy and Spike developed looks that said "Oh crap." And the vampire breathed on Edward's neck (on the left side) preparing to bite. This caused Edward to form a "WTF!" look on his face, while he thought to himself "What kind of freak is this?"  
Which was followed by Edward's right fist and the vampire's face becoming acquainted in a much more personal manner.

The vampire was thrown rather far, causing Buffy to think, "I wonder where his strategically placed wall is?"

"Nice punch." Spike said.

After recovering from the shock of the vampire attack, which took a few minutes of silence and staring at one another; though how Edward was able to stare at two people at once remains a mystery to the author. Anyways, following this Buffy began her 'I'm the Vampire Slayer so I have to take care of everything' mode.

"We should get out of here and back to the Villa, Willow will probably head there once she figures out that we're not here. Also we have to figure out what to do with… Edward?" she asked while planning.

"Just call me Ed"

"Now that matches your height."

"What was that?"

Spike looked to where the other vampire was thrown, "Nothing."

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Alphonse was looking for his brother, "That looked like a bad rebound." He thought to himself as he called, "Ed?"

He thought he could see a body where Ed had last been, but it did not look like Ed. Remembering that Envy was around, he was very cautious approaching the body when he heard,

"So the FullMetal pipsqueak went and turned himself into a woman?" Envy cackled

Al looked, it was a woman, but she did not look like Ed. "Shut-up." Al commanded.

Envy smirked and ran off saying, "Maybe after you fix your brother and teach him how not to turn himself into women you can catch me" followed by manic laughter which really made Al wonder what living for centuries did to the brain.

Al watched Envy leave, taking note of the direction and then walked towards the person lying on the ground again. The woman had red hair with pale skin and she was unconscious. Al could not see if an injury was the cause for the unconsciousness, but he also could not see his brother. Figuring that if he left the woman she would not fare well he picked her up as gently as a suit of armor can and walked towards the lights of the city.

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Willow started to slowly wake while wishing that the pounding in her head would go away. Still she started to awaken her senses as she heard voices. She could distinguish two voices, one was obviously male as it was deep and commanding. The other was young and sounded hallow, but she could not make out much more than that. So she decided to open her eyes with the first sight that greeted her being metal, and lots of it. Someone in a suit of armor was holding her; she realized that within the first moments of opening her eyes. The next thing she did was shut her eyes and groan, there was far too much light.

"Well, I guess she's not died, maybe she can give us some insight. And even though it would be funny, I doubt that fullmetal managed to turn himself into a woman, especially one that is taller than him." The deep voice said.

The first thought running through Willow's head at that statement was, "Who names their kid fullmetal?"

The person holding her gently said in the young voice, "Are you alright?"

Willow groaned again, she really just wanted to sleep right then. She realized that something had taken most of her energy or something and now she was wondering why.

She felt herself being put down rather softly on a rough material with lumps under it, which she realized was a couch. Opening her eyes again she saw the owner of the other voice, a tall man with dark hair and darker eyes. If she wasn't a lesbian she would have thought him to be cute. However, she saw in his eyes a haunting that she could not place. Seeing her eyes open again the man said,

"Who are you?"

"My name is Willow."

"Where is Full Metal?"

"?"

"Edward Elric, the Full Metal Alchemist, where is he?"

"?"

"Ok, where did you come from?"

"I am originally from Sunnydale California, but I was vacationing in France."

"? Where is California?"

"America" Willow said very slowly thinking that the man's ass and head were probably interchangeable.

"Which would be where?"

"North America. The United States of America. Right below Canada and above Mexico."

"?"

"What? Where am I?"

"You are in Central Headquarters"

"Where is that exactly?"

"Central"

"Which would be where?"

"Amestris"

"Which is where?"

"It is a country that is surrounded by enemies, are you one of those enemies?" The dark haired man was clearly annoyed by this.

"How can I be an enemy of a country I haven't even heard of?"

"How can you be in the middle of a country and not know the name of it?"

"?"

Al finally decided that this was enough and broke in with, "I think she hit her head and maybe that is why she is confused."

"Who are you?"

"I'm Alphonse Elric, you can call me Al."

"Oh… who are you?"

"Colonel Roy Mustang"

"Oh… can I sleep somewhere? I'm not feeling too good right now."

"Take her to FullMetal's dorm Al, and keep an eye on her."

"Brother won't like it if when he gets back someone else is in our room."

"I'll find and take care of your brother then Al, just get her out of here while I figure out what is going on." Mustang replied.

"Ok" Al said as he gently picked Willow back up and carried her towards the door.

"I can walk"

"Oh, yeah, sure." Al said while looking as embarrassed as armor can, followed by him putting her down.

As they walked out of what Willow realized was Mustang's office they almost ran into a pretty blonde with brown eyes dressed in the same type of uniform as Mustang.

"Al! What are you doing here at this time of night?"

"Um, brother did a transmutation and I think there was a rebound that hit this young lady on the head. So when I couldn't find brother and she looked injured I brought her here."

"Wouldn't a hospital have been a better idea?"

"Yeah, but they probably would have asked questions and brother does not like me around them unless he is already in it."

"Oh, sorry, I'm First Lieutenant. Hawkeye." The blonde said as she offered Willow her hand.

"Willow, and I am very pleased to met you" she replied thinking about how cute the woman in front of her was, then mentally yelling at herself for not thinking of her girlfriend, Kennedy.

Introductions done Al said "See you later Lieutenant."

Hawkeye replied the same and they parted ways.

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A/N: Thank you for the reviews and constructive criticism as they were very much appreciated. I need to edit a few things that were pointed out, luckily there was not too much that people noticed wrong which makes me feel all good inside. So since I hate long author's notes: Thank you kelol, Cat-chan (didn't realize that so thanks), and Harryswoman; I hope this fulfills the demands for more )


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